So at the coffee shop they encourage reading of a sort. They have a magazine rack to rival any doctor's office. We picked up a Cosmo, Tom and I, because the cover said in big letters, "100 Hot Things To Do To Your Guy!" I have a guy, I bet he'd like hot things. Then in small letters under "Just wait till you try number 43. He'll thank god he's a guy."

I flipped madly. I mean I thank god he's a guy all the time. I want that for him too. I couldn't find the 100 hot things. So I carefully went to the beginning and past the Oxy ad was the table of contents. I scanned. Cover Stories. 100 hot things. Page 182.

I flipped. Number 43 not on page 182. Here it is on page 184... I read it. It said, "Tug gently on my balls next time you go down on me."

I had no idea this was a secret. Tom says we belong to a specific subsect of the population, he and I. Tom says our subsect is privy to such information and other segments are not. He somewhat persuasively argued that it may be possible straight people didn't know to do that. That Cosmo blew this ball tugging thing wide open, so to speak.

I'm dubious.

Posted at 3:01 a.m.

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