At five o'clock it was punch time for me and Peth and Theresa. We were to be replaced by Addie's O and another student worker. But O was going to be late, no question, and the other student worker never showed. So, naturally, Theresa bolted for the door. She has no patience for such things.
Peth and I sort of looked at each other and she said, "It's ok. You can go. It's ok. I have to be here, but you don't. I'll wait for the student worker and O."
I protested, but not very much because I am selfish. About the time I started to protest a girl came up to the desk. She spoke with a vocal affectation that was very high, breathy, and quiet. She batted her long eyelashes at me and ran her hands through her long bouncy curls, down the side of her torso and rested them on her hourglassy hips. She considered herself to be a vision.
"Are there other study areas?" she asked. "I'm meeting a study group here and we need a place to study." She bit her lower lip and cocked her head to communicate her sexy innocence.
Peth took the lead on the answer. "Well, there are the other two floors. The two other library floors. You could try one of those."
"Oh thank you." The girl ran the palms of her hands over her tight stomach and squeeled a little. She sucked the tip of her index finger, which had the ancillary effect of filling out her already full lips a bit more.
Let me interrupt the narrative flow for a moment to give you a bit of background about how the law school building is set up. The law school is six stories tall. The ground floor and the second floor contain classrooms. The thrid, fourth, and fifth floors contain the library. The sixth floor has the administrative offices.
The elevators access all six floors, but if you want to get into the library on the fourth or fifth floor, you can't take the elevator without a key. You must enter on the third floor, go through the security thingy, and take an internal staircase to the upper levels of the library. This is to prevent theft and to irriatate the patrons who do not want to use the stairs.
Now the internal staircase is a few steps from the circulation desk. It is behind a door. The door is marked "STAIRS." Beside the door marked "STAIRS" which cleverly conceals stairs, there is another door. This door says "EMERGENCY EXIT. DO NOT OPEN. ALARM WILL SOUND. WE'RE QUITE SERIOUS. WE HAVE NO REASON TO LIE ABOUT THIS. THERE IS A LOUD LOUD ALARM THAT WILL GO OFF IF YOU OPEN THIS DOOR SO ONLY OPEN IT IN EMERGENCIES." It's not deceptive.
So the girl turned on her heels and walked over to the elevator. As she walked away the scent of naval oranges and peppermint clung to the space she vacated. She summoned the elevator before we realized what she was doing. "No," I said. "You have to use the steps. You can't take the elevator to the upper levels of the library. You have to take the steps over there."
Peth was backing me up with some wicked stern nodding. I pointed to the stair case. The girl went off in the wrong direction, hair bouncing. We let her go because she was becoming irritating. Five or six minutes later she realized her mistake and reappeared at the circulation desk.
"I couldn't find it or something," she said. "Where is it again?"
Peth and I looked at each other and silently communicated the following question to each other: "how is it possible for a law student to have survived an entire semester without coming into the library? How is that possible?"
So I pointed to the staircase and she followed my gaze and the direction of my finger. Then she said, "over there?"
Peth did some more wicked stern nodding.
She headed off toward the stairs. Before long the alarm sounded. The girl reappeared before the circulation desk. "I couldn't find it," she yelled over the alarm. "That girl over there told me it was that door. But it wasn't." She cocked her head to the other side causing her hair to bounce around. When it finally settled a single curl fell over her eye. I wanted to rip it out of her scalp and see if it caused bleeding.
Peth climbed under the desk to cry. I took the girl to the door that said "STAIRS" and I shoved her into it, mushing her face against the sign that said "STAIRS." "It's this one" I said helpfully. "The one marked 'STAIRS.' It's this one." The alarm made my fillings vibrate.
I left shortly thereafter.
Posted at 6:36 p.m.
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