2002-09-16 � House Cleaning

Today is Yom Kippur. I am not Jewish, but many of my colleagues are not at work today on account of the holiday. Additionally my co-clerk is under the weather this morning, so she's not in. She said she has a stomach flu, so we don't want her in. What with all the fluids evacuating from her digestive track and all.

The place is a morgue.

Ellen brought something she's calling "Gentile brownies" because she feels Gentiles should be celebrating something too. I'm inclined to agree.

******

I would like to thank all of you for your guesses regarding My List. I am delighted by all the things you think could be true of me. Perhaps at some point in the future I will have the ability to render you unconscious, or maybe I will train enough to become a master swordsman, or maybe I will have some desire to become Misty's lover even though she is Caucasian. I don't know. I just don't know.

However, to date, most of those things have not come to pass.

And now I come clean, so to speak, about the single truth hidden in my long list of lies. The truth is:

87. My ear wax isn't solid. It's fluid. And sometimes it drips.

Horrifying, no? But it's true none the less. Some people have to worry about ring around the collar. I have other concerns.

Peth says my ear wax situation means I can't be Asian, but that flies in the face of my ancestry.

I don't know what to think. What do you think?

******

On my birthday, two of the clerks from different chambers presented me with a hand made card. It was produced on a piece of lime green paper using blue and yellow highlighters and a black shapie. Inside was the following original poem composed just for me.

Wishing you a happy birthday
Hope no squirrels come your way.
Enjoy your day
When you get your pay
Although you probably won't get it today.
Thanks for the cake, what more can we say.

******

Recently Wee sent me an image to accompany my accounting of the horrible bat encounter of a few weeks back.

Thank you WeeOne for thinking of me.

Posted at 10:27 a.m.

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