Over the weekend, Bevin, a bonafide lesbian, asked me the following question via my guestbook. "Brian," she asked, "what does 'shoot some rope' mean?"

Well, I haven't been able to see my way to answering this question. It's not because I don't love her, of course I do. And I can see how she may not know about rope shooting, being a lesbian and all. But I'm ever so shy about it.

Therefore, I turn to you, loyal reader. If you don't mind, would you leave her a little explanatory message? Be as colorful as you like. She can take it.

~~~~~~

Tidbit 2: Reading Ironically.

As you surely know by now, I'm passionate about living ironically. I of course use the term "irony" in the hip POP understanding of the word as redefined by Alanis, and not the stodgy traditional understanding of the word as defined by irony. You know what I'm talking about.

For example, sometimes I wear orange to Irish pubs. Other times I stand on my tip-toes in rooms with low ceilings. And after a couple of tequila shooters I've been known to try and teach my cats to play fetch! Ahahaa-haa! I'm so ironic!

Anyway, I try and carry that sense of gleeful irony to my reading. I have found the best way to do this is via the bookmark. For example, when I read the brilliant Fast Food Nation by Eric Schlosser, a book exposing the influence of the fast food industry on virtually every aspect of the culture, I used a coupon from Checkers entitling the bearer to two Checkerdogs� for two dollars to keep my place. And when I squirmed through Confessions of a Shopaholic by Sophie Kinsella, a novel in which the main character, a woman I related to far too easily, teeters on the edge between impulse control and insurmountable debt, I used a statement from an overdue credit card account and highlighted the balance due portion in sunflower yellow to hold my spot.

So as I finish up, Live From New York by Tom Shales and James Andrew Miller, an oral history of Saturday Night Live and I discard my Entertainment Weekly subscription card which has served me so admirably as a bookmark over the past week, I find myself in a bit of a pickle. Tommy has just recently purchased a copy of Dan Savage's Skipping Towards Gomorrah: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Pursuit of Happiness in America which he presented to me as a gift. I'm anxious to begin reading it, but I'm not sure what to use as a bookmark.

Let me give you a little more information about the book. Here is a short description of the book, I've taken from the book cover.

In Skipping Towards Gomorrah, Dan Savage eviscerates those [moralizing, conservative] cynics as he commits each of the Seven Deadly Sins himself (or tries to) and finds those everyday Americans who take particular delight in their sinful pursuits. Among them:

Greed: Gamblers reveal secrets behind outrageous fortune.
Lust: "We're swingers!"-you won't believe who's doing it.
Gluttony: Dan meets gluttons with attitude at a pro-fat conference.
Sloth: Leave it to Dan to find a way to celebrate this sin that will get him in trouble with his mother.
Anger: Texans shoot off some rounds and then listen to Dan fire off on his own about guns, control, and the Second Amendment.
Envy: Meet the rich-then be glad you're not one of them.
Pride: You'll never look at a gay pride parade the same way again.

Couple all this sinning with a unique history of the Seven Deadly Sins, a new interpretation of the biblical stories of Sodom and Gomorrah, and enough Bork, Bennett, Buchanan, et al, bashing to more than make up for their incessant carping, and you've got the most provocative book of the fall.

So, I turn to you, dear reader, for the second time in this entry, to provide some input. What do you think would be suitable to use as a bookmark in a book eviscerating the seven deadly sins when one is trying to read ironically? Sign my guestbook and let me know.

Now, before you even start in on me about how this concerted effort to be ironic completely undermines the whole principle of irony, I'll remind you that I'm using the Alanis version of irony. The one that doesn't really have to be ironic at all. If you people were a little dumber, I wouldn't have to harp on this point so I blame you for the repetitive use of this Alanis image.

Ok. So, let me know what you think I should do about my little problem. I'm anxiously awaiting your myriad interesting responses.

Posted at 11:36 a.m.

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