There's my crazy straight ex-boyfriend for example. When I say crazy I really mean it. He hears voices that tell him they are going to kill him. And sometimes he sleeps in a tub filled with water to "keep the bugs off." Plus he's "straight."
Then there's this guy who tries but can't get past what ever it is that makes him screw up. He goes on and off his meds and you can really tell when he's off. He can and will do anything for attention. For example, he wore a chicken suit to class once because other mean students convinced him it would be a good idea.
And, of course, there's the glove guy. This guy is actually homeless. That's right one of my class mates in law school is homeless. He won't touch much with his bare hands so he wears plastic gloves. He won't buy books from the bookstore �cause they got the cooties and won't sit in an assigned seat in class. And did I mention he lives under a bridge and he smells like, I swear to god, kitty litter. He has only one shirt and one pair of shorts and wears both everyday even in the winter which I guess is ok, but sometimes it gets cold under the bridge. Of course, since he's homeless it's not like he has a closet or anything, so where would you keep your second shirt? It's a real problem.
So there's just three examples. There are more, and there are probably more that I don't know about. All in all I know of 9 people with severe mental illness at my school. And I'm not talking about Suzie who got stressed out and a little depressed. Or Johnny who compulsively steals bucketfuls of ketchup packets from the cafeteria. And they're in LAW SCHOOL. Presumably some day they will be advising people about how to handle their affairs.
The guy who hears voices that say they want to kill him. That guy could help you file bankruptcy or broker a real estate deal or, god forbid, defend you from an unjustified tort claim! That guy who lives under the bridge could handle your divorce or draw up your will. Isn't that scarey? I know I'm a little creeped out.
My question, I guess, is does law school attract the mentally ill or does law school cause people to become mentally ill? Somebody better start keeping tabs on me. If I start talking to an invisible friend call the ambulance and fire up the electro shock �cause I'm comin' in for a landing.
Posted at 3:37 p.m.
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